Kazakhs are Cute

When in Toronto, we watched the Borat movie. It was so wrong, but hilarious. It didn't really need to be about a real country, most people seeing the movie probably don't even realize that it is... but that doesn't stop the Kazakhs from getting ticked...

Today I caught a bit of an NPR story about how the country is responding to the movie... part of which included Ten Borat "Facts" that embassy spokesman Roman Vassilenko is disputing... my favorite being this one:

Borat says: The traditional Kazakh beverage is fermented horse urine.
Vassilenko says: The traditional Kazakh beverage is fermented horse milk.

OK, I'm not sure they should have responded to that because any kind of fermented milk just sounds gross.

Oh, and Vassilenko is pretty damn cute, so just having his picture up on NPR should be a boost for Kazakhstan PR.

I'm having trouble deciding what to dress Littl L up as for her first Halloween. This is a big decision. You can't go back.

I think I'm partial to the lobster costume, though I'm not sure why... but I also like this very cute shark costume... "Knock, Knock. Who is it? Candygram".

I think we will get her a guitar, then the lobster costume and call her "ROCK LOBSTER!"

Squidsoap

This Squidsoap is ingenious... not only is it a really cute soap dispenser, but it puts a little ink mark on the kids hand when they press it... the ink mark washes off after about 10-15 seconds, so the grubby little germballs wash their hands well enough.

I'm going to get one for my grubby little germball niece, Mya! And when my own little germball is older, you can believe she will be getting inked.

When I had time, a while back, to actually surf the internet, I found some great sites for really cool baby clothes. I haven't ordered anything yet, but I will.

I found these ones, that I find especially funny, at THE Retro Baby, MY Retro Baby, and at Jolie's online.

Little L got a tooth! She was super cranky last week, then a spec of white showed up bottom right. I don't think the crankiness is over, I'm sure the bottom left isn't far behind.

This kid definitely takes after me, she loves to sleep late (slept well even through the pain of teething) and she's definitely going to be a foodie - any other time she looks off at other things, but if you're eating something, suddenly you are intriguing and worthy of her attention. Pizza and beer seem especially interesting to her. At first this frightened me, but then I realized... she will be well prepared for college.

The film fest was great, one of the best years in terms of movies. We lucked out and got to see Borat... it was so wrong, yet so right. There were no close encounters of the Colin kind, but seeing Will Ferrell and Zack Braff within yards was exciting.

And the crepes, my GOD, the crepes! I'm almost ready to drive 3 hours just to get a crepe.

We are going to the Toronto Film Festival this weekend, I think it's our 6th year. It's the one time I have a little more luck spotting celebs, as opposed to when I'm in LA. Like a few years back, when I SPLURGED for 1 night at the Mondrian, a celeb hotspot hotel, in hopes of getting on an elevator with a Cindy Crawford or a Johnny Depp. Nope. Here's my luck - shopping on Melrose and Danny Bonaduce walks by. Mind you, this was BEFORE his come-back with his reality show and before he and his wife started selling this really cool clothing, Countess Couture. My younger sis-i-law didn't even know who he was. Later that night, at the Skybar, I was sure I there'd be A-list elbow rubbing. Nope. Guess who's there... Danny Bonaduce!!

But in Toronto two years ago, we had the ultimate encounter. Colin Firth, my favorite actor, was suddenly three feet away, waiting to be seated at the restaurant we were at! And he looked at us, probably to see what we had eaten and if it looked appetizing. I always try to sneak a peek at other people's food. Anyway, he is adorable and it was so exciting to see him so close. We later saw his film Trauma, which was excellent too.

I wish this were him on the phone with ME, enjoying our banter immensely.

I too, like Jenny, am very excited about the launch of the Kodak blog - A Thousand Words.

What Jenny doesn't say in her post is how much she did to bring this baby to life. She not only set such a great example with the success of her blog, but she worked tirelessly to document, design, promote, administer, coordinate, tweak, present, setup, educate... and many other things... to help make this happen.

I am proud of Jenny and I know everyone will LOVE her posts. I'm ready to ride that coat tail straight to Martha's house for brunch =)

I have been tagged by Jenny. Here are the rules:

List 5 weird things about yourself or your pets or your kids*. Tag 5 friends and list them. Then, those people need to write on their blogs about 5 weird things, and state the rules, and tag 5 more people. Don’t forget to let the people you tag know by posting a comment on their blog!

*Jenny changed it to include offspring, because I don't currently have any pets, but I have a child that I like to dress up like an animal.

1) Lauren has over 40 little red dots (hemangiomas) all over her body. We call her various nicknames, like "Dotty", "Little Red Dotting Hood", and "Red Buttons". Someday I will tell her that they were kisses from her Guardian Angel, Grandma Barbie.

2) I have issues with belly buttons. I don't like to touch them and barely like to think about them. I was in my 30's before I could even SAY belly button out loud.

3) Ironically, Lauren has a herniated belly button. It's like a little balloon. But after some time, I've grown used to it... maybe even a little fond of it. But thank GOD it should go away when she's about two. Otherwise, I'm going to start saving for umbilicoplasty.

4) Lauren makes this wierd noise, kind of like the sound of static - "kghkghkghkgh"

5) We have a little video monitor on which we watch Lauren in her crib. The camera has a little green light on it, so she looks directly at it a lot. It makes her eyes look solid black, so she looks like a little alien baby. Then she makes her "kghkghkghkgh" sound into the camera. We are greatly entertained by this.


I’m tagging:
1. Lisa
2. Greta
3. Lucky Olive
4. Tinybaby
5. Bean of Hope

Ode to Pluto

Pluto, Pluto, how can it be
They stripped you of your title
why can't they see
that you will always be a planet to me

Jenny got me hooked on the show Dirty Jobs with Mike Rowe, a show on Discovery Channel where he goes and does, well, dirty jobs. I didn't watch it initially because it just looked too gross. Bugs and sewage and stuff. But the more Jenny talked about how funny he is, and made me watch the HILARIOUS episode on harvesting big clams called geoducks (gooey-ducks), the more I felt compelled to watch it. In the new episode he shaved Alpacas. They spit on him, too funny.

I went to the website and took the What Dirty Job Suits You test. I got these results:

You dabble in the depths of disgust, but only after making sure that no one is watching you. You are torn between your natural instinct to get down and dirty, and society's rules of order and decorum. In other words, you are likely to pick, scratch or rub in the privacy of your own home, but never in the light of day.

CAREER RECOMMENDATIONS: Long-haul trucker. Strange uncle or aunt.

Hubby says that's good - I ALREADY am a strange aunt.

Jenny appropriately bought Lauren a little tee that says "LITTLE SLEEPY HEAD"at Old Navy this weekend.

I went picture crazy again, more pics are up

I wish I had a pet so I could tattoo it.

On thursday my Sis and Mya (my 4 year old niece) decided to put a fake tattoo on Lauren. The conversation with my niece went something like this:

Mya: we put a tattoo on Wauren
Me: What?!
Mya: it's a baby bu-er-fwy
Me: uh oh, Uncle Charlie might not be too happy about that
Mya: it's just a reawy tiny tattoo
Me: I know, but Uncle Charlie (abruptly cutoff)
Mya: BYE

We were watching tv Saturday morning when, in the background, I heard a familiar song... I started singing to Lauren as she began crying...

What's-a matter you? Hey! Gotta no respect. Hey!
What-a you think you do? Hey!
Why you look-a so sad? Hey!
It's-a not so bad. Hey! It's-a nice-a place.
Ah, shaddap-a you face!

Hubby was astounded, "You know the words? You've heard this song before?"

I thought everybody knew the Shaddupa You Face song. Maybe just Italians? Either way, I'll teach it to him because it's alot of fun to sing, especially to a crying half-Italian baby.

Quite a few years ago, my Mom bought my Gram a Cabbage Patch doll. We were visiting Gram this weekend. Lauren met "Johnny". She was confused. Was it a mirror? Was it her twin? Was it her new boyfriend? Someday we'll tell her the truth about "Johnny".

I became a Peetnik today. It's Jenny's fault. She got me hooked on Peet's Major Dickason's coffee when she innocently brought me back some as a souvenier from her trip to CA last month. So as I ran out, I found myself in dire straights. But now I'm a Peetnik, so it will all be ok. I will have the coffee delivered to me automatically each month. Whew!

If only Jamba did the same thing. Yet another thing Jenny got me addicted to, among many others... her home-made Bugogi... Lay's Lime & Cracked Pepper Potato Chips... I thought they'd be gross, but they were YUM YUM YUM. Then my sis came over and was dipping them in tuna fish. Again, I thought "super-gross", but tried it and BINGO, another top 10 food addiction.

Jenny also did the near impossible, got me to like salad. She found a secret weapon - Emerald Nuts Glazed Walnuts - throw them on some lettuce with some Craisins and Honey Balsamic Vinegar dressing - and it's a salad I really like, not just feel socially obligated to eat.

There are many others, too numerous to mention. I suppose I've done the same to her... we're always excited to go to a city with a Cheesecake Factory and chow down on the likely-laced-with-crack Chicken Madeira! And going west always means we start singing our favorite little ditty, "In-n-Out, In-n-Out Burger, In-n-Out, In-n-Out Burger"...

Little L is getting so strong, she is already trying to sit up on her own, so I ordered her a Bumbo chair. I hope it comes soon, I can't wait to see the little one try it out. I hope she doesn't flop forward and do a face plant.

I'm reading this book called Secrets of the Baby Whisperer : How to Calm, Connect, and Communicate with Your Baby. I figured if the Dog Whisperer can help so much, this might be a good read. Bottom line: babies need structure. So I'm trying to follow the author's E.A.S.Y. plan - Eat. Activity. Sleep. You (as in ME time, which is a joke, because ME time usually involves doing laundry, dishes, or, if I'm lucky, actually washing my hair).

We were doing pretty good with the E.A.S.Y. plan on Sunday until, just as I was about to give Little L a bath (an Activity), hubby called - his truck had crapped out nearly in the middle of a major intersection. I had to pack up the kid and drive out to get him. $650 later, his truck is fixed, for now. Little L took it all in stride though, not too much Birth Control Crying out of her.

This is what they do to my child at my sister's house.

For the last two mornings, Lauren has cried for the entire half-hour morning commute. The ear-piercing Birth Control Cry. Last week she was falling asleep within moments of the rubber hitting the road. This week, she is putting me on the highway to hell.

She's also comes home from my sister's smelling like food. The other night, she smelled like a donut. It was so distinct, it nearly sent me into a Krispy Kreme frenzy.

The following night, it was still a donut, but this time a chocolate donut. Yet another near desperate trip to K.K.

And yesterday, I am positive she smelled like buttered toast.

I'm sure my sister has not been cooking donuts in vats of boiling oil while caring for three kids. I'm also pretty sure that she didn't make SO much toast that it infiltrated my child's pores. So I ask myself, am I a food halucinator? And is Lauren the trigger? What is happening here?

Today she smelled like buttercream frosting. Really.