Wednesday, February 21, 2001

Bellybutton Issues

At lunch today, somehow the topic of bellybuttons came up. The mere mention of a bellybutton (the word in general), makes me have to pee - it actually causes a physical reaction. Touching it is 10 times worse, I feel it directly, well, um... down there. Jenny was quite amused by this revelation and proceeded to mention the word "bellybutton" many times over, seemingly enjoying the horror she was evoking in me. She thought it was psychological, relating to me the story that her Mom told her - 'don't play with your bellybutton, it will put air in your stomach and make you sick'. Nope, the psychological implications of bellybutton issues is a whole other can of worms. Mine's just strictly physical.

I've met a couple other people who claim the same. So my questions now are: do some people have a direct link from their bellybutton to their urethra? How common is this phenomenon? Is it all psychosematic? Am I a freak? Time to do some research...

So now YOU probably have a question: How do I clean my bellybutton? Aaaarrrggghhh, the mere thought of it... must go pee... I'm afraid if I looked in my bellybutton I'd find a family of dust bunnies hanging out, enjoying some tea. That's all I can say on the subject, I have to run to the ladies room now.

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