Thursday, September 21, 2000

Bone-Tooth Removal

Ow, ow, ow, my stitch-gob hurts. I got my bone-tooth removed yesterday. It took about 5 minutes to get the novacaine shots, which hurt like HELL, and all of about 23 seconds to remove the bone-tooth. My tongue probing had lead me to believe it would be the size of El Capitan but it was, in reality, the size of an obese flea and was quickly whisked away by the thing that sucks up the spit you can no longer swallow on your own.

THANK GOD FOR NITROUS OXIDE!

Some unsolicited advice: next time you go to the dentist, request, demand, or BEG for the gas. It doesn't stop the pain, but it certainly makes you not care about the pain... You're too busy picturing yourself as Captain of the Enterprise and thinking, "this alien can torture me by poking sharp objects into the roof of my mouth all he wants but I will NEVER give away Earth's secrets!". It's also pretty cool to look at the light that 5 minutes ago looked like a simple attachment holding a swivelling lamp and see a sweet looking little robot-like character holding on to his headlamp creature friend for dear life. One of these days I'll post my drawing of Robobobbie, as I've affectionately named him.

I firmly believe that our office should be equiped with a Nitrous Oxide tank in order to facilitate the kind of creative thinking needed to invent really cool web applications. Wonder if I can get that through on an expense report...

Tongue Play

So back to the bone-tooth, I got it removed because I couldn't stop tonguing it. You know how that is, right? Any strange goings-on in your mouth and your tongue is all over it like it's a new puppy. You can't help yourself, it's almost a subconscious thing... until your boss walks by and asks if you're having a seizure and you realize your face is distorted by your tongue reaching and fondling some little piece of loose skin in your mouth. That's why I got the bone-tooth removed and just when I thought I'd have relief, I have this stitch-gob attracting my tongue like a 13 year old boy to Britney Spears. Do you think I'm burning calories with my tongue in constant motion? =)

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