Wednesday, February 19, 2003

Back to the harsh reality of upstate NY. My sister calls it "the f**ing tundra". But I'm still glad to be home. Grizzy got picked up from the kennel today all squeaky clean with a big bow around his neck. I was relieved to see him... he just turned 11, no spring chicken... and I'm worried about losing him too. I think my hormones are out of whack... I'm having these irrational thoughts and another round of intense grieving. Crying every night. It started in FL and continues. I think that being around Chuck's parents brought home the harsh reality that I have no parents. Both gone. Too difficult to fathom at times. I still think, "I have to call Mom and tell her..." then realize... then sadness overcomes me.

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